The Oatmeal: This Is What My Car Needs

Kinja'd!!! "MoparKetchup" (moparketchup)
02/03/2014 at 13:15 • Filed to: the oatmeal

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theoatmeal.com/blog/car_needs


DISCUSSION (20)


Kinja'd!!! For Sweden > MoparKetchup
02/03/2014 at 13:17

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Flash your hazzards once.


Kinja'd!!! ddavidn > For Sweden
02/03/2014 at 13:19

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I've more often seen people get madder at this than the incident itself.


Kinja'd!!! ddavidn > MoparKetchup
02/03/2014 at 13:19

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Yes, I would also like this as a bumper sticker.


Kinja'd!!! Textured Soy Protein > ddavidn
02/03/2014 at 13:23

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Yes here in 'Murrica most drivers take great offense to flashing high beams.

Some states actually outlaw it.

Flashing hazard lights, usually the reaction is "something is wrong with this person's car."


Kinja'd!!! PRBot II > MoparKetchup
02/03/2014 at 13:24

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They exist. I've seen better ones than this, but it's what I can find for now.

Link


Kinja'd!!! Luke's Dad Sold His 2000TL To Get a Sienna > Textured Soy Protein
02/03/2014 at 13:26

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I flash high beams to tell the other person to go when we both awkwardly stop at an intersection stop sign at the same time.

I also use them when I'm on the freeway and I want to tell the car in front of me THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING.


Kinja'd!!! ttyymmnn > ddavidn
02/03/2014 at 13:27

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Hazards, not high beams.

Here in Texas, and I would imagine in some other states, we have the "Texas pass." If you're going at or below the speed limit on a US or state highway, and a faster car comes up behind, it's customary for the front car to pull over to the shoulder to let the faster car pass (when it's safe to do so). You don't have to slow or stop, you just use the shoulder briefly as a lane. Once the faster car has passed, it's customary for that car to thank the other driver with a friendly wave or a flash of the hazard lights.


Kinja'd!!! Tekamul > For Sweden
02/03/2014 at 13:27

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It's just not universally accepted as intended. Sometimes that's how you flip someone off when it's 10 below outside.

Usually accompanied with the boo-hoo hands

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Kinja'd!!! Textured Soy Protein > Luke's Dad Sold His 2000TL To Get a Sienna
02/03/2014 at 13:28

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I wish more people understood what flashing high beams meant, especially if we could all just flash to pass instead of everyone aggressively tailgating to communicate that.

But in my experience when I've flashed my brights at people in any situation other than at an oncoming car on a back road that has their brights on, people seem to get super pissed off at brights being flashed.


Kinja'd!!! Bad Idea Hat > Luke's Dad Sold His 2000TL To Get a Sienna
02/03/2014 at 13:29

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I tend you use my high beams in the TFAYD method. Unfortunately, that also tends to be a license to dick it up some more.


Kinja'd!!! ddavidn > Textured Soy Protein
02/03/2014 at 13:29

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Yeah I'm pretty sure it's illegal here. But either hazards, highs or a wave can spark some people to think you meant "thanks" instead of "sorry".


Kinja'd!!! ddavidn > Luke's Dad Sold His 2000TL To Get a Sienna
02/03/2014 at 13:30

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Yes, that's a good use of the highs.

I've had to do this a couple times when I used to drive almost 300 miles round trip to see my girlfriend, and had very little tolerance for slow minivans from Canada on the freeway.


Kinja'd!!! Stupidru > PRBot II
02/03/2014 at 13:32

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I've always thought that a scrolling marquee with pre-selected text controlled via buttons would be a great idea, albeit redneck as hell


Kinja'd!!! willkinton247 > For Sweden
02/03/2014 at 13:34

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this is actually a great way of saying it.

I usually shrug and make myself look small and say I'm sorry a lot.


Kinja'd!!! willkinton247 > ttyymmnn
02/03/2014 at 13:36

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This would be wonderful if it was the case in the rest of the states. But everyone is so caught up in their own little world that they don't notice, nor do they care.


Kinja'd!!! willkinton247 > Textured Soy Protein
02/03/2014 at 13:37

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This is actually what race cars do to cars in slower classes in sports car racing. I wish it worked on the roads too.


Kinja'd!!! PRBot II > Stupidru
02/03/2014 at 13:39

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It is a great idea, but I have a feeling if they became popular most of the messages people would use would be:

"Presidential Candidate 2016"

"Vote Yes/No On Prop Whatever"

"Co-exist"


Kinja'd!!! Stupidru > PRBot II
02/03/2014 at 13:51

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Good thinking. Nevermind, this idea needs to die with fire.


Kinja'd!!! Yowen - not necessarily not spaghetti and meatballs > ttyymmnn
02/03/2014 at 14:02

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Yeah, can't do that in Michigan, we have mailboxes close to the road in some places, you'd clip three of them before you come to a stop.


Kinja'd!!! wkiernan > MoparKetchup
02/03/2014 at 14:09

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My car needs this:

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